I've always prided myself in not being a diva-type of actor. (Yes, I recognize the irony in that sentence.) But trying to be in a play when I have a little baby has proven challenging, and I'm afraid I'm turning into that diva who expects special consideration to be made for her.
See, here's the thing. When I agreed to be in The Odd Couple, I had a baby who usually did really well with Daddy, babysitters, anyone. Sometime in the last 5 weeks or so, little elves switched that baby for one who wants Mama and will accept no substitutes. Especially in those emotional evening hours.
You can imagine how totally frustrated Daddy is--while I go to the theatre to have fun, he's been left with a screaming Zoodle. Not every night, but often enough lately that it feels like every night. Zoodle's figured out that Daddy doesn't feel like Mommy, and he certainly doesn't smell like Mommy. (I'm considering pumping into a squirt bottle so I can spritz The Engineer's chest with eau de breastmilk before leaving. Think it would help?)
Finally The Engineer and I had a good talk. "Family should always come before a job," he insisted. "And this isn't even a job!" And as hard as it was to hear, he was right.
So I've e-mailed my director to let her know that I either need to bring Zoodle to rehearsals with me next week (the last week of rehearsals), or come to rehearsals late (since I don't come onstage until about 2/3 of the way through the play.)
Honestly, I should have set this boundary already, but confrontation isn't my favorite thing. And really, that's not fair to anyone--I've been stressed about leaving Zoodle; The Engineer has been awesome but is now teetering on the brink of insanity; and my director deserves an actor who trusts her enough to be honest. I'm pretty sure she'll respond positively, and I wish I'd given her the opportunity to do so earlier.
We open next week. Hopefully my request for special consideration will make the next seven days pleasant ones. And during curtain call I'll push all the other actors behind me while I bow repeatedly for five minutes. I might as well be the very best diva I can be.
Edited, 7:44 p.m.
My director sent back a very nice e-mail. I'll be going to rehearsal an hour and a half late next week. Yeah!
7 comments:
You Go Girl! Diva Star!!!
I'm sure it will all work out! I've just started my own independent once a week adventure and DH is not appreciating me too much either! LOL
I think that mommies need breaks. I think that you should enjoy your acting and that Daddy needs time with Eli. Eli will learn that he can't always have his mommy. believe me Beth, we went through this with Noah. I would leave and Noah would run out into the garage screaming. you just have to go.... I will pray that things get easier. Mommy can't always be with the kids. He is their daddy, remember.
I have to agree with Rebecca. It's important to YOUR sanity to get some time away too and in time he'll get used to and love being with Daddy. Have you tried wearing one of Jason's T-shirts for a few hours and then having him wear it when you leave? Tell him to wear a padded bra too...like Meet the Fockers :). Hope your play goes off well!
Thanks for the T-shirt idea; I'll have to try that!
I appreciate you ladies wanting to protect my "me time" but honestly, for the good of our family (which Jason's a VERY important part of!) I am very comfortable with what I've asked of my director. I will be at the theatre 7 days in a row starting Sunday, and 5 of those days Jason will be working in addition to taking care of Ana (and possibly Eli). When it was just a couple of days a week it was different; this week, he needs a break.
So, while I welcome opinions and comments on my blog, please know this is an issue I've already made my decision on.
Thanks!
Beth,
Good luck! I hope Eli does well for you and that your Director is supportive. Just minimize his exposure to the diva-ness :)
Lyndsay
I think it is great that you and Jason can have open, honest conversations like this and come to a reasonable decision! That speaks volumes about both of you and your marriage in general. Praise God for that. And Beth, good for you doing the confronting. God blessed you with the response of your director!
I'm so glad your director was willing to work with you! I am sure that will be much easier on you all.
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