Tuesday, July 27, 2010

One-on-one

Saturday Chickie and I headed out for a couple of hours for some one-on-one time. It wasn't anything fancy. I was doing grocery shopping at Wal-Mart, and we stopped at the in-store McDonald's for lunch. (I think that sentence just doubled my redneck rating!)

I had such a nice time with my girl. I don't even remember what we talked about, but it was relaxing and fun. At McDonald's Chickie ate Apple Dippers...

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...and played with her Happy Meal toy...

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...and I didn't feel the need to rush her to finish as quickly as possible so we could get home.

As I sat there with her I realized just how much more relaxed I am when it's just Chickie and me, without Zoodle. When both kids are with me when I'm out in public, I tend to feel rushed and often grumpy.

Why is that? I wondered.

I think part of it is that is just the ages they are right now. I can have more true conversations with a 4-year-old than with a 2-year-old. I can trust that Chickie won't run away from me in the store (well, not far away, anyhow.) It's easier to relax with a preschooler than with a toddler. Pretty soon Zoodle will be old enough for me to let down my guard a bit with him too.

Part of the issue, though, is that when there are two kids, I'm outnumbered. I have twice as much to watch out for. Two kids are making requests and demands. Two kids are sometimes obeying and sometimes not. And I just want to get done so we can get back to the familiar, relatively safe and relaxing comfort of home.

But it was so enjoyable, letting myself relax on Saturday. And I think with some planning (to leave the house early enough) and the right attitude, maybe I could learn to be more relaxed with both kids too. The result would be three people who would enjoy running errands more than we enjoy it now.

Relaxing two-on-one time? It's certainly worth a shot!

5 comments:

Lola said...

I get anxious just THINKING of being with both kids alone.
I do it often- but it is still utter chaos. (I'm taking a road trip to PA with them, by myself in about 2 weeks).

With one- it is so much more enjoyable! Definitely agree! You can sit back- enjoy the moments and with a 4 year old- the conversations can be awesome when we give them the moment to really express themselves with our full attention.

Eternal Lizdom said...

I far more enjoy one on one time with either of my kids than two on one time.

A big part of it is that when both kids are together, the competition is automatic and even when they are getting along, there is bound to be some sort of fallout within the next few mintues.

I think that's why parent-child dates are so important. We always here about it from the child's perspective... but I think time alone with one child reminds us, as parents, about what makes that child so unique and special.

SurvivorBlessing said...

When it was just Coqui and me, I loved to go places with him. Over Christmas, we had an outing together where it was just him and me, and it was so much fun. He enjoys having 'Me' for him all alone, and I enjoy that I can just enjoy him!!! It is soooo great. I can relate to you.... glad you got to do it.

Vixbil said...

I love going out with just one of my children and it is sooooo much more relaxing than with all of them. In fact with all of them I am just wound up all the time. Let me know if you manage relaxing two on one time and I'll follow what you do to the letter
xx

Sandra said...

I think any time a two year old is involved in something, "relaxing" just isn't one of the words that comes to mind! But he'll get there. :)

I'm glad you and Chickie had a good time. Now that our children are adults, it is sometimes amazing to hear them talk about what we as parents would have considered very small events that are included in their fondest memories.