I am a Wreckporter.
Have you started reading Cake Wrecks yet? It's a hilarious blog, and lately I've been scouring Wal-Mart's clearance baked goods for Wrecks. I found one recently; it was a small cake and marked down to $3.50 (though why no one would buy this gorgeous cake at full price is beyond me.) After using a stale loaf of clearance French bread to beat off several other wannabe Wreckporters, I snatched up the perfect little cake, bought it, photographed it, and sent it over to Jen, the brilliant Cake Wrecks blogger.
And yesterday...well, I'll let you read for yourself! My wreck is the first photo in the post.
I like what Jen said about it, but I'll also share with you what I wrote. I sent her the picture that she posted (which I've now given Jen all rights to, along with a partial ownership in my firstborn child) and also sent her this one:
And here's what I wrote in my e-mail to her:
It's two, two, two cakes in one!
First we have a lovely white candle (magically dripping red wax.)
Flip it over, and it's an exclamation point. Or is it a marshmallow being burned at the stake?
A cake that inspires such creative interpretations is truly a work of art.
I actually bought this cake (on clearance for $3.50) just so I could photograph it with something other than my crummy camera phone. What a sacrifice, for the sake of Cake Wrecks.
Then I ate it.
21 comments:
NO-YOU-DIDN'T!
I am not sure that I am worthy of being in the esteemed company of a wreckporter ...
I'm not sure I've ever been so proud of my sister. *sniff.*
I need to start looking for Cake Wrecks. Unfortunately our two supermarkets that we use have good bakery departments.
I just need Hannaford (our closest supermarket) to transfer the deli girl to the bakery. The deli girl who did not know how much 1/3 of a pound was last time we were there ... she gave us 0.25 pounds, and we said, "No, 1/3 of a pound" and she looked at us blankly, added another 0.25 pounds to total 0.5 pounds, and asked, "Is that okay?" I bet if they let her loose in the bakery, she'd make a masterpiece.
An honor indeed! I keep my eyes open but have yet to see the perfect specimen. Yea for you!! When I saw the name Beth, I wondered if it was you. You gotta love the Walmartz. It's the only place I really look.
too funny! That blog is hilarious! I'm still so confused about what this cake is really supposed to be though... Hope it was yummy at least!
I was very excited to see you on there yesterday!! I just sent in a wreck yesterday... we'll see if it gets picked...
OK, so what is it supposed to be????? I'm super excited to know a wreckporter.
I recently started following Cake Wrecks based on your recommendations ...and saw this one yesterday! That was C. Beth's cake! Cool! The blog is completely amusing and hilarious!!! Thanks for the "inside" peek at your wreck reporting and YAY for you!
Well, now you've really got me interested. I'm going to have to start following Cake Wrecks, and try to "score" with an ugly cake of my own! Well, I don't really mean "my own" because, of course, I make nothing but "lovely" cakes. I mean I'll start watching the "reduced" cakes in the store bakeries. Who knew, such fun could originate in the grocery store!
Beth:
That is truly hideous! What even is it? Congratulations as being the winner. What Walmart is good for...delivering good material for Cake Wrecks. :-).
Oh, my...that is quite a cake. I hope it was at least tasty. Congrats on being featured on Cake Wrecks!
HAHAHAHA! I saw that cake yesterday on CakeWrecks and thought, "What in the world is THAT?!" That's so awesome it was your cake. :)
A friend of mine was on cake wrecks this September, with her sexy rendition of Tom Selleck. (I blogged the cake here.) In fact, the cake was so popular, someone asked their local bakery to replicate it! Which got Tom back on CakeWrecks!
FYI Becki: Don't watch the Real Housewives of Atlanta. One of the moms was helping her about 8 year old son do math homework. He asked, "Is 1/2 bigger than 1/3?" And she said, "No. 3 is bigger than 2. Wouldn't you rather have 1/3 or something instead of 1/2?"
Congrats on the honor! We're so proud. * sniff *
:)
You've arrived! You've made the big-time! Very cool. I saw that one yesterday and it gave me a little shudder.
Do me a favor: please, please, if you ever see something so utterly yucky made by me.....have mercy.
OH! I am so proud to be bloggy buddies with a real WreckPorter! I saw that cake yesterday and was simply baffled. I think they posted it upside down from your picture, but good gravy, it's scary either way. Hope it tasted better than it looked! :)
I've been meaning to check out your blog but to come here today by chance and see my worlds colliding? It's very trippy.
I can see where you are spending DH's well earned money;-) This made me laugh! Hope it tasted better than it looked!!
Way to go, Beth! I'm impressed that you could recognize it as a candle. I was definitely having a "what on Earth...?" moment when I saw the pic! :-) There are never any wrecks at my grocery stores. It is so disappointing!
Congrats Beth!!!!
I've been on the lookout for a Wreck for a while, but no such luck!
Lyndsay--Yeah, I figure it definitely puts me up on a pedestal. ;)
Becki--HA!! Clearly she didn't have you as a math teacher!
Tia--I need to start bringing my real camera to Wal-Mart, because I've seen a couple other ugly ones there. My camera phone stinks. And I can't be buying cakes all the time. :) You're right, Walmartz is just such a good Wrecky place to look.
Katie--I think it was a candle. That's what it looked like to me--I just took both pics (right side up and upside down) because if you use your imagination it can be any number of things...all ugly!
Liz--YAAAY! I mean, I need other Wreckporter friends; I'm having trouble relating to all my lowly "regular" friends now. ;)
Angie--I think it was a candle! Just really poorly done with oddly-colored wax drippings....
Jenners--Ah, now that you're reading Cake Wrecks you'll be a Wreckporter too before you know it!
Sandra--You have inspired me so many times--I am THRILLED to "inspire" you to Wreckporter greatness! :-D
Laurel--I think it's a candle. And, hey, Wal-Mart is also good for CANDY CANE OREOS!!! :)
Becky--Well, I love ridiculously sugary things, so, yeah, it was tasty. In a very lowbrow, non-discriminating-palate way. :)
rainylakechick--I LOVE the Tom Selleck cake! So funny!
Isabella--Aww, thanks for being proud. Wanna buy an autograph now?
Forever Folding Laundry--Oh, no way--your cakes are gorgeous! If you ever do a Wreck it'll be a beautifully-done one! :) Like the Tom Selleck cake! Wrecky just because it's such an odd thing to have on a cake, but still really cool!
ElleBee--I actually sent her both pics. The one she posted is (I think) the right side up one.... :)
Call Me Cate--Hey, welcome!! Thanks for reading!
Hillary--Yeah, thankfully he just kinda laughed and shook his head, I think. :)
Kara--Never before have so many people been sad that their grocery stores have good bakery sections! :)
Anna--Keep looking! I'm already hoping to find #2! :)
Every time I come to your blog I leave hungry! :)
Love, love, love your Christmas pics! So great!
Hey, I have some photos of you....what do you think they would sell for now that you're famous?? ;)
Good eye, Beth!! That one's a wreck for sure! I still can't make any sense out of it!
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