I wrote last week about the challenges of being a gestational carrier. I'm so happy to report that these days, the sailin' is smooth.
Ann and I have tried to keep the lines of communication open through this process, but there have been times we just haven't known how to effectively communicate. Lately, however, we've both had breakthroughs that have made a big difference.
By sharing more about her pain, Ann has been receiving wonderful support from the people around her. She's finding so much freedom. I can see that a weight has been lifted from her. It's hard to live in dark places when there are so many people wanting to support you and bring you into light! The reality of cancer and infertility isn't always easy, but Ann is choosing to focus the bulk of her attention on the beauty of this situation, and to accept the love and support of the people around her.
Ann also encouraged me to be more open with her about how I was feeling--even when that's hard for her to hear. It's not easy for me to share things that feel "confrontational," but Ann made it so clear to me that she wants the truth! After writing my blog post, I was able to talk to Ann in more detail about my struggles with this process, and she's been so caring to me. I also have been choosing to enjoy spending time with Ann, instead of withdrawing due to my emotions and hormones.
In other words, Ann and I are both purposefully enjoying this process more, and purposefully doing things that help the other person to enjoy it too. It's a whole lot more fun doing it this way.
I know that the nature of this situation means there may still be emotionally-charged times, and that's okay. But Ann and I both feel we've crossed a bridge, leaving the most difficult times behind us. We're both really excited to experience the next 5+ months of pregnancy together, and to meet an amazing little baby at the end of that time.